Favorite Jokes

  1. A Buddhist walks up to a hot-dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."

  2. When a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?

  3. Q: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
    A: They taste funny!

  4. My top four favorite things to do on the starship Enterprise are:
    4. Put banana peels on the transporter pads just before the landing party beams back.
    3. Plug Nintendo cartridges into Mr. Data.
    2. Use the shuttlecraft for skeet shooting.
    1. Replace the self-destruct computer sequence with the Final Jeopardy song.

  5. Q: What is the primary use of cowhide?
    A: To hold cows together.

  6. The hot-dog vendor prepares a hot dog with the works and hands it to the Buddhist, who pays with a $20 bill. The vendor puts the bill in his cash box and closes the lid. "Where is my change?" asks the Buddhist. The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."

  7. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright before you hear them speak.

  8. Q: Why did the Buddhist refuse Novocain when having a tooth pulled?
    A: He wanted to transcend dental medication.

  9. I was obsessive-compulsive until I wrote, "I will not be obsessive-compulsive," one thousand times.

If you like math, you might find these math jokes funny too.

Compilation © copyright 1996 by Eric Postpischil. Photograph © copyright 2001 by Eric Postpischil.